ladyfirestarter | (no subject)

The desert's chilly at night. She's brought a jacket.

Charlie sits on a particular rock a few miles from the Taos complex, knees drawn up and arms wrapped around them, looking at the moon.
I am looking for someone who can take as much as I give
And'll give back as much as I need, and still have the will to live
She hasn't been able to reach Prometheus for over a month now. Not from here; not from Milliways. She's still in the habit of taking out the little clay figurine at odd moments, running her fingers over its rough-smooth surface in something like meditation.

She's doing it now.
'Cause I am intense, I am in need, I am in pain, I am in love
But I feel forsaken, you know like the things I gave away
The fallout of things at Tet has left a bad taste in everyone's mouth. The security guy, Stuart, that's upsetting; the Board member, Adamson ... that's sickening. Treachery from inside. Treachery from above.

Lot of good people, she told Charles Wallace.

And blood and fire are too much for these restless arms to hold

Her blocks have to stay up while she's on the campus, for fear the kids will pick up on her negative emotions. She's alone now, and can let down the blocks and look at what's behind them: anger, and fear, and a bewildered sense of loss.

And I'm calling you, calling you, from ten thousand miles away

Over and over her fingers slide along the kouros, as though counting off prayer beads, and no answering warmth comes.

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And for a moment she's silent, breathing in the combined smell of leather and cigarette smoke that's already become deeply comforting.

One hand slides behind his back; the other rests loosely curled against his chest.

His chest rises and falls, evenly; after a time, he glances down at her. "You're holding up."

It's another apology, peering out from behind the statement.

A deep, slightly shaky indrawn breath, and she sighs "Yeah."

She doesn't pull away.

"Sorry about ... coming apart all over you."

His lips quirk.

(You were there. I remember now.)

"Oh, hell, I've seen messier."

(It shook us from the mountaintop.)

That gets her to look up at him, with a wry smile.

"Hell, you've seen messier from me."

"I think if anybody gets accused of being hyperdramatic around here, it should be me. You're a much tougher nut to crack."

"...So to speak."

She nudges him in the ribs, gently.

He squirms away.

Still ticklish there, you know! Slightly!

Charlie relents. This is not a night for mock attacks.

"So," she says, trying for a cheerful tone. "We all caught up now?"

Prometheus shrugs. "We're all caught up on the business side of affairs."

"Well."

She shifts now, stretching one arm upward in exaggerated fashion.

"Good to have that out of the way."

"That it is."

Eyes trained on the arc of her arm.

Light-hearted: "So, you doing anything tonight?"

Charlie gives him a look of tolerant affection. You're not fooling anybody, you know, that look says.

Her arm comes down and settles across his upper arm and shoulder.

"Come here," she says softly.

"This is me getting points for subtlety, right?"

He's compliant. He's missed this.

"Points for something, anyway."

So has she.

"It's all part of my clever plan," he grins, nuzzling beneath her ear.

"Really?" she murmurs, leaning into it. "Tell me more."

... That's going to be difficult if you don't take your mouth off his, Charlie.

"Can't," he mumbles back, one hand idling about her waist. "Not unless I'm sufficiently bribed."

"Maybe," breathed against his jawline, "I should just wait and find out."

Low in his throat, "Less waiting, more finding out."

I am intense, I am in need, I am in pain, I am in love
The teasing humor drifts away like smoke, as she threads her fingers through his hair and moves in to kiss him again.
I am intense, I am in need, I am in pain, I am in love
What she's lost isn't here. But something else she needs is.
I am intense, I am in need, I am in pain, I am in love
Something she still has.